Things that go bump in the night

There are few things I hate more than spiders. To say I have a phobia of them is an understatement, in fact just typing the combination of those letters sets my skin a’twitching and I am looing over my shoulder in fear of anything with more than five legs. Saturday morning I awoke to find my right ankle burning while my scalp and face itched like nothing else, and that isn’t even covering my immediate need to run to the loo where anything and everything came pouring out of my end hole. Not a pleasant image. As I sat there on the pot I reached down to itch my ankle and found a large, red, swollen spot with what appeared to be fang marks in the middle. I was so freaked out that I rolled the older kids out of bed and forced them into an impromptu clean of their rooms. I told them if their spaces weren’t “maid clean” not to bother coming down for breakfast or lunch. Normally they would have bitched themselves blue but after taking a look at my ankle and knowing my arachnid fears they shut up and went to work.
For the last few nights I have done a thorough search of my room before bedtime. It has been vacuumed, dusted; everything short of a toxic bug bomb. Last night I awoke in the middle of the night to scurry of legs across my face. I am hoping it was a stray potato but who lurks in my room and I haven’t the heart to kill, but I was still so freaked out that at 3:12 am I lay awake for an hour reading and hoping the crawly things would just go away. I’m hoping this isn’t some form of karma slapping me in the face.

Aside from the obvious fact that I have some pore issues on my lower legs, this is a pretty rough view from all angles. Damn bugs. I am at least thankful that whatever bit me didn’t bite the children, they would have far sicker than I. I am also hoping it got a tummy full and has moved on to tastier grounds. Though I do have to say that from a survival standpoint my limbs would make for good snacking.