Equilibrium, of sorts

One of the things about having an explosive teen issue is that I have recently come to appreciate some of the other aspects of my life just a bit more. For example, I don’t much care for children until they are about five or six years-old; I like them to be able to wipe their own rumps after a poop and to tie their own shoes. Sure, they’re super cute when they are younger with the huge heads and chubby arms, but I respect some independence in a person.
Lately Devon’s quirks don’t irk me quite as much as they did several months ago. He might argue with me, push my boundaries, but I know he isn’t going to go out with his under achieving friends and do naughty things under the bridge by the skate park. Cassidy and I have also reached a peaceful spot. Her tsunami of energy hasn’t been scaring me nearly as much as it usually does. I understand that she will breeze into a room, work it and work it hard, but then when she leaves I can trust she is using her powers for good and not self-destruction. These aren’t huge victories but they are the little flags to which I am clinging in hopes that the teen thing won’t bring me to my knees. And if I am being completely honest, Loren isn’t entirely doing me in. He will spend an entire afternoon pushing me to the brink only to turn around and need me in the next moment, not understanding why I have to take a breath or five before I can summon the patience to extend a hug to him. I get that he is in the throes of puberty, peer pressure and the whole bit. But it is still a trying journey of daily urges to pack him off to boot camp. And it will pass, it all will pass and I will miss them and wish them all back at home for even just a moment or two of chaos. So just for today I will strive for some inner peace to appreciate the now. Maybe an easy task since Loren spends Thursday nights at his dad’s house.