Shut up because I so have it together

A few weeks ago I got off my ass and ordered a round of new cell phones for the house. My old ghetto phone worked but rarely felt so inclined to ring. One cell phone had a number but not a phone and the other took calls but didn’t transmit them. In the process I ended up getting a phone for the kids, a huge step and one that I didn’t really want to take. When the phones arrived, Loren and Cassidy were so giddy that they not only had an actual phone (Cass has been carrying around non-functioning cell phones for years just because she thinks they look so cool) but that it was cool looking and took pictures and played games.
That was all a few weeks ago. Today I decided to get off my ass yet again, because this mother gig so often requires that sort of crap, and do some laundry. The kids had just gotten home from a weekend with Matt so I gathered up the clothes and popped them in the washer with a feeling of I-Am-Mom-Hear-Me-Function-on-a-Higher-Level-Than-You. About 30 minutes later Loren came tearing down the stairs asking me where his jeans were. Upon hearing that I washed them his face fell.
“Well, they were filthy. And you didn’t even bother to put them in the hamper. Work on that, okay?” I replied with all the smugness I deserved. Loren then said, “My cell phone was in the pockets. Did you empty them?”
All my self-rightousness evaporated into the bile pool that wanted to erupt from my stomach. No, I didn’t empty the pockets. I did a quick check and felt nothing. But the new phone is like a milimeter thick, how was I to know he would leave his phone in there? We both ran to the washer, pulled out the wet pants and the phone tumbled out.
Yep. A full wash cycle. Not feeling so smug anymore. Nope. Not at all.

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6 Responses to Shut up because I so have it together

  1. Anonymous says:

    I have a long standing rule (learned from my former mil when she pulled a frog from one of her son’s pockets). I don’t check pockets although I do feel through the material for anything large (usually).
    The girls have learned the hard way to empty them. So did my boys.
    I have turned an entire load of white clothes pink when a lipstick got in there somehow.
    I have washed my atm card and driver’s license more than once when I’d just shoved them in a jeans pocket to run to the store. Did you know paper money will make it through a washer-dryer cycle intact?
    Hope you had insurance on the cells although it’s gone up to a $45 deductible here.

  2. ann adams says:

    That wasn’t anonymous, that was I.
    Ann

  3. Anonymous says:

    Aw crap. I’ve done that…Sucks doesn’t it?
    I know.
    I’m sorry…Is it under warantee…Blame him. Tell the store he lost it or it got stolen…They should replace it, no?

  4. Anonymous says:

    I’ve actually done this before. Take the battery out of the phone and let the pieces dry out for a day or so. You can gently dry the battery compartment out. Then charge the phone, and hopefully it works again! Did for me.

  5. merseydotes says:

    I just read somewhere that you should leave the phone in a big bowl of dry rice for a few days – the rice absorbs all the moisture and everything goes back to normal. Here it is. Can’t hurt to try, right?

  6. kim says:

    I have been the guilty-get-it-all-done mother that ran the son’s ipod through the wash.
    It still doesn’t work. :(